Love Is Love//Return To Dust
Code Orange Kids
Immediate download of 10-track album in the high-quality format of your choice (MP3, FLAC, and more), plus unlimited mobile access using the free Bandcamp listening app.
released 20 November 2012
all rights reserved
feeds for ,
- Track Name: Flowermouth (The Leech)
i have never felt as empty as i feel today
even when the moments beauty fades in and away.
thats all it is. a moment.
and the images creep back into the forefront of my brain
from picking up the pieces of unearthing devotion. reenergizing dead feelings.
i can see the flowers growing out of your mouth
while the cancer in your brain begs to get out
and ill try to understand (your) pain again
by laying my body on the fire
by accepting myself as the enemy
it doesnt take much to recognize that these leeches aren't my friends
and it gets harder when everything goes through a formula filter (your head)
erase the ones i love the most so i can bleed in peace.
relieve the poison from my tongue
embrace a reverie.
- Track Name: Around My Neck//On My Head
"we have the same feelings that we have had"
i knew what was different when my skin didn't crack.
my callouses didn't burn.
my stomach didn't sink.
i just internalized the loss. embraced the weakness.
toe to toe with "one day at a time"
it has become as routine as watching you sink into cold/dead/skin
the void where that fire went
or where the last one rested its skull. fucked.
or the next one
the rope hanging from my fathers hotel window
around. my. neck. on. my. head.
- Track Name: Sleep (I've Been Slipping)
its the nerves that keep this breeding
and sometimes when I'm sleeping i can hear it breathing in my dreams
"it’s them pills I took, to bring it off, she said"
april is coming more easy and when it rains it pours
but it knows the reality that once we break in certain ways nothing is ever the same.
the stitches are already in place.
and another day is over
but the floor still feels the same. and I'm not ready to change
I'm not afraid to die
but its the rush that keeps me alive……..
- Track Name: Liars//Trudge
as serenity floods // driving my brain in circles.
humility reminds me to just let the composure be.
"god grant me the power to know the things i can change
the things i can't
and the difference"
but this pain has a face. vilified. unstricken
deeper than what my soul can give // higher than my mind
sharing all of my late night testimonies while your tongues touch
as the rat creeps past my eyes, onto your legs
dragging my mourning threw the streets of our town
first impressions // second glances at souls you'd think you know
have you ever dreamed you would wake up dead? id swear that i have
but my word is temporary residence of a minds eye.
endless fucking trudge.
recognition vs the ability to let go
of the places and people that destroy me the most
in ways there is no rhythm or reason.
and in that lies the sickness
you. just. know.
- Track Name: Colors (Into Nothing)
the love fades against a colors change
the loss shakes against the cold
tearing pieces from my decrepit skin
just to try and keep you warm.
- Track Name: Nothing (The Rat)
break me into something worth it
more then the heads of statues
even if the trend reconciles itself i will still wake up wishing i didn't
so maybe instead ill choke on these anti-anxiety pills
so i don't have to swallow the flavor of life floating away
in your hands against his chest or my head against the bathroom floor
but every morning is a clean slate
and my back starts to break. my face starts to change.
alignment of the way i act and the way i am, because
its an emptiness.
an abundance of layers buried out of necessity
a laundry list of accomplishments
stage the disease
control the crisis
sell your soul to words that mean nothing.
- Track Name: Roots are Certain//Sky is Empty
i keep forgetting the things that i have felt so easily
with the wind it all brushes off of me
into the holes in my teeth
so ill spend the rest of my life in structures and colors
the shape of what your face used to mean
in a box
laden with the ones still here
cutting palms on open trees
your on the edge of something.
the roots are certain // the sky is empty
- Track Name: Choices (Love is Love)
there are no mistakes. only decisions.
the choices that you choose to make.
and the night that you saw them choose (the way i watch you choose)
you described it as a "physical pain" in your spine
i watched your spirit break
i felt the collapse of my mental complex as my head hit my hands.
i would rather be alone forever then suffer "out of body experiences"
it resonates in these waves of human garbage that frequent my memory.
images of floating bodies, scathed,
replaying in my heads airwaves.
so i will just lay back down.
in this bed i buried inside of your house.
a hollow hole that i have dug for myself.
a home that i have settled into.
because i've been slipping into nothing
and these thoughts are worthless
as long as actions keep showing the same signs of
"if it looks dead and it smells dead…."
its probably fucking dead.
- Track Name: Bloom (Return to Dust)
there is a certain way we move these chains
like a watch in a box that doesn't tell time but instead just gives it
it all starts to bleed into miles that separate
or phone calls that aren't on pace
like the chemicals my grandfather gave me
disarrayed and misconstructed
the wrong blend
but my only vice is the will to give in
to the only feeling that has ever felt worth it
excuse-less // trying to figure out whats worth keeping
when i don't hate anyone else even half as much as i hate myself.
it numbs in the never ending quiet that burns my eyelids
learning to learn between the lines of
"i want you to be free"
i want to return to the water.
to drink in the sex//sleaze//mud//greed
put a gun in the mouth of the sky and just (breathe)
or to where i can bathe in my own conscience.
sometimes i wake up in the ER with a needle in my arm
or in the back of a mangled car
in the silence before the light comes
but it always ends the same with a flood coursing through my veins
trying to find words to lay out the things i could never say
the way the world picks at my brain. how i can't watch you leave.
blood is blood
but as everything comes and everyone goes..
love is love.
return to dust